How To Talk To Women
Guys are always asking me for good tips on how to flirt with girls in various situations, such as the best way to approach women at bars, or even how to talk to girls on the phone. The bottom line is, guys are always looking for an “edge” with girls… they want to learn things they can say to make women feel interested in them and “turned on.” But really, the first thing these guys need to study is what type of talk turns chicks OFF.
For example, one of the worst things you can do when talking to women is come off as a “needy” guy. Most men don’t realize that they are coming across “needy” when talking to a woman. But the women picks up on it quickly. It’s obvious to women when you are trying to impress them. And when a guy attempts to impress a girl during that first conversation, it has the opposite effect: it turns her off.
How To Talk To Women – Attraction Secrets
Coming across as an insecure guy is extremely unattractive. You can’t talk to women and seem like a nervous wreck and expect her to feel attraction towards you. Women are turned on by guys who are confident and sesure with themselves. If she senses that you don’t possess those traits she will quickly lose attraction towards you.
Women are turned off by guys who are “boring.” If you’re talking a woman you need to know how to keep the conversation fun. If you find yourself struggling to fill awkward silences, asking her boring and predictable “interview” questions (“So where are you from?” “What do you do for fun?” etc), it’s a safe bet that the girl you’re talking to is going to tune out pretty quickly.
Here’s another way that guys screw up when they talk to women: they don’t display any social intelligence. You’re probably wondering what “social intelligence” means, so let me explain. Women are social creatures. And they blindly follow the social “norms.” One of the fastest ways to make a girl think you are “below” her is to seem like you have no idea what is cool or socially acceptable. Guys display a lack of social intelligence when they make stupid or inappropriate comments, fail to read the “signals” the girl is sending him, or when they keep cracking jokes that no one (except for him) finds entertaining.
When you consider it realistically, you really can’t blame a woman for not wanting a weak, insecure, socially clueless, boring, or needy man. (You can flip it around and ask yourself, would YOU want to hook up with a girl who had those qualities?)
OK, now that we’ve covered the type of talk (and men) that turn women off, let’s move on and discuss…
What type of talk turns women on?
The main thing to keep in mind is that you want to talk to girls in a way that brings out their flirty, fun and playful side. The 1980s hit song “Girls Just Want To Have Fun” says it all. This holds true in any environment where women are hanging out socializing (bars, clubs, parties, etc). More than anything else, she’s there to have a good time. You must be able to flirt with a woman in a way that makes her feel like she is back on the playground with her childhood crush.
Women are creatures of emotions. When you talk to women, you need to be aware of their emotional state — and the state you want to PUT them in. Talk about topics that evoke an emotional response from her, and cause her to experience emotional memories. Don’t focus on anything sad or morose. I’m referring to topics such as her passions, hidden talents, the best vacation she ever went on, etc.
You need to display that you are a socially intelligent man. Women are insanely turned on by men they believe have power, status, and social approval. The good news is that you really don’t need to have power, status, etc. You just need to make her THINK you have these qualities, by talking to her in a way that conveys confidence and self-assuredness. You have to talk to her from a place of power, status, and SLIGHT superiority. It’s a rule of human nature: if a girl feels that you’re slightly above them on the social ladder, they’re going to want to “hitch their cart” to you and be a part of your world.
==>For a CHEAT SHEET of lines to say, click here.
Next, you must talk to girls in a way that brings out the “sexy side” of their personality. The fact is, you can be having the greatest conversation in the world about a topic like “health food” but it will rarely lead to attraction. To move out of the realm of “friendly conversation” and take it to a deeper, more intimate level, you’ll have to talk to her about more personal topics. This doesn’t mean you talk about sex… but it does mean that you don’t shy away from personal and intimate topics. These are the sort of topics that create rapport and have women start feeling a connection towards you.
Very few guys understand the dynamics of how to talk to women in a way that creates deep interest and attraction. The vast majority of men are flat-out boring, or convey so much insecurity that women want to get away from them as fast as possible.
I know this because I’ve coached hundreds of guys on how to get better with girls. I’ve seen how badly most of them “freeze up” when they have an opportunity to talk to a really hot girl. And if they don’t completely freeze up, they try to talk to her — but come across as needy, boring and insecure, which is a lethal combination.
You’ll notice that guys who are really good with women will LEAD the conversation in a fun, flirty and playful manner. She wants you to be able to make her laugh, smile, and feel safe and secure around you.
==>For a CHEAT SHEET of lines to say, click here.
In brief, the key to attracting a woman is to talk to her in a way that makes her feel fun, enjoyment and a sense of excitement when she’s around you — while slowly letting the sexual tension build. Then it’s about being dominant enough to go in for the kiss at the exact moment she is waiting to be kissed.
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